A religion for our times
Thomas Hylland Eriksen
Norway Now, spring 1998
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[Image] Suppose our civilization were to disappear suddenly and
completely, say, next week. Although no humans survived to
About this interpret it, large numbers of artifacts and archives
site survived for intelligent life forms emerging in a distant
future to interpret. These future archaeologists would be
[Image] bound to conclude that although humanity seemed to have
worshipped many gods and goddesses -- ranging from the
Relational Buddha to the Spice Girls -- one peculiar religious ritual
index seemed to have been nearly universal. It was reported on
several pages every day in most of the newspapers, it was
[Image] sponsored by whisky producers, computer companies and
media conglomerates, and it took place regularly; not in
Thematic mere churches or temples, but in open-air venues much
index larger than the Colosseum. The purpose of the ritual would
presumably have been to illustrate the ultimate futility
[Image] of life by sending out twenty-two athletic young men (or,
more rarely, women) on a grass field to kick a leather
Alphabetic ball back and forth until they were utterly exhausted.
index
Once every four years, this ritual attained a truly global
[Image] character. In many parts of the world, the period around
this climax seemed to have been a frenzied one, where most
Recent other activities and preoccupations were temporarily
abandoned.
[Image] We are, as the readers cannot fail to have noticed,
approaching the end of one such cycle these very days.
World Norway is among the twenty-four chosen countries, and as
the country is these days moving towards a virtual
standstill, the public sphere is slowly being filled to
the brim with information about "our" footballers. To
profess ignorance or disgust in this respect is, as the
countdown brings us closer to the sacred kick-off,
becoming more politically incorrect than refusing to
celebrate the 17th of May, Constitution Day ¡ which,
according to surveys, enjoys the support of over 90 per
cent of the Norwegian population.
The national team's legendary manager, ex-Maoist Egil
Olsen, is approached with a reverence formerly reserved
for popes and presidents, and the youngsters whose single
discriminating trait is their ability to kick a ball at
the right moment in the right direction, are depicted as
demiurges; the attentive public will at any given moment
know everything about relevant topics such as their food
habits, marital status, salary, recent performances and
whether or not they have successfully recovered from minor
injuries incurred in recent matches.
The priests of this highly successful religion are the
sports journalists. While reporters on politics and
culture are grateful to see their work in print at all,
sports journalists are routinely provided with large
colour illustrations, huge headlines, and unlimited
opportunities to present all their banalities, their
self-indulgent chattering, their uncensored emotional
outbursts and their helpless clichΘs in prestigious
spaces. It has nothing to do with topical priorities,
quality or relevance to the country's well-being. The
omnipresence of football cannot be understood lest we
realise that this is religion. The question which needs to
be answered for those of us who fail to see the unrivalled
beauty and mystery embodied in twenty-two sweating blokes
fighting over a ball on a grass field, consists in what
exactly it is that this religion worships: what are its
central tenets and values; what does it have to say about
what? Hopefully, future archaeologists will provide an
answer.
P.S. Under other circumstances, perhaps this intense
attention would have been reserved for philosophical,
literary and artistic types. Consider the news headlines
in such a society: "Young Ph. D. student claims to have
refuted Kant"; "New metaphors in recent collection of
poetry, says publisher"; "Will marry my secretary, admits
Professor Hansen"; "Johnsen finally RECOVERED: New novel
better than last one". Perhaps, to think of it, it is just
as well that intellectual pursuits are confined to narrow
spaces in black-and-white.
⌐Thomas Hylland Eriksen 1998
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